there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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