whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
bring money and cleavage
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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