I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Randomize