if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Randomize
