Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
