margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
