Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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