but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
