When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
