yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
