So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
