I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
