I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize