How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
