is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
