I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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