okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
