Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize