I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
well, you know. whores of a feather.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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