She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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