She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize