yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
