I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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