Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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