would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Randomize