Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
