my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
