My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I believe in your delicious
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
