He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
