Buhtt sex?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
