i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
