Sry I called you an 8
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
