I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
