Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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