I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
