If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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