I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
