it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
