if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
