The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
