Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
