dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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