Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
