i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
