I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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