I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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