you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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