never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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