i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
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