So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Buhtt sex?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize