he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
